Category: Giggles & Bits

Things I Wish I Could Un-Know

~ JodiLea

I am not a squeamish kind of girl. I can talk about bodily functions or medical procedures while eating, and I am amazed when others are grossed out. However, even I have my limits, and some things I would like to wipe from my memory. For example these:

  • Ted2– I thought that the original movie was dumb. But the 2nd one? Ted’s language alone grossed me out.  I will never be able to look at Tom Brady in the same way again. I hoped they paid him good money. Please, Mark Wahlberg, spare us Ted3!!
  • Pennywise (the clown from IT).  If you are not nodding your head, check out the book or see the original movie. If you dare.
  • The Earth is Spinning– In grade school they taught us about how the Earth spins and orbits around the Sun. Then they tell us that without gravity we would all fling off into space. That factoid kept me awake for weeks! I still get nervous when I think of it.
  • The T-Shirt police – These guys are at Disneyland, and probably lurking at other “family fun” places too. They go up and down the lines in the parking lot of people waiting to enter the park, reading T-shirts.  If they find someone who violates the dress code they pull them out of line, embarrassing them and send them to the restroom to turn their shirts inside-out to hide the “offensive material” from the public. Do yourself a favor and wear non-logo, non-smartass remarks, shirts to Disneyland. Trust me.
  • Rattlesnakes –  Hubby made me look at the one he killed, so I could be able to identify them. Knowledge I had already, but now I know they can be in my driveway.

♥  TTFN  ♥

It’s Thursday!

~ JodiLea

I have been remiss about G&B Thursday’s. 😦  My summer is scheduled up, my to-do list is overflowing with important things to do and I have a moral dilemma trying to prioritize it. If I manage to slow down and get something done, I feel guilty about what I did NOT do.

I believe this craziness is the exact reason G&B was invented in the first place.  Nothing relieves stress like a deep belly laugh can.

I hate admitting this, but there are days when I just don’t feel funny. Sarcasm usually carries me through, but lately I am too un-focused to write (or research) funny.

But wait! There is a solution…

Now YOU can be featured on Not Pretending (to be sane)! Share a funny story from your life, or let it all out in a rant (very therapeutic.) If a photo or poem gives you the giggles, please submit that  🙂  If you are shy – check the “remain anonymous” box and your identity will be kept private.

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Thank you for your response. ✨


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Since this is not a contest to win money or items, we can skip over the legalize and fine print. However, please keep in mind that this site is rated PG!  My eleven year old granddaughter reads this blog, so “R” rated (raunchy) material will NOT be published. 

What It Is, Man

~ JodiLea

I promised that this Thursday’s Giggles & Bits post would reveal the mystery of  “What Can It Be?”

CheeseCake

Sorry dear readers, but it is not a tortilla. Quite a few of you guessed that one and if I didn’t know better I would have guessed that too. One reader thought it was foam on an Orange Julius – a fabulous guess, but alas, you are wrong.

A backed away from the pan view, reveals my latest culinary disaster: WartyCake

This is supposed to be a white birthday cake.  Every ingredient is edible. I followed the recipe to the letter. My kids may not believe it, but I did everything the recipe called for, without any substitutions. It was a very picky recipe that took using four mixing bowls so you did not mix ingredients until it said so.  No recipe ever told me to grind (in a food processor) granulated sugar before, but I did it. I did everything correctly.
And this is the thanks I get…
I had just cleaned my oven last week so the window on the oven door was sparkly. Meaning I had a perfect view into the oven where I watched in horror while lumps and bumps began rising out of the once smooth batter. I bet that this was not the expected behavior. My not-so-lovely cake had warts and craters. At some angles it looked like the surface of the moon.

As I agonized and whined, hubby laughed. By the time it finished baking I had giggled a few times myself, while vowing to never be caught without a Betty Crocker cake mix in my pantry. Making cakes from scratch is overrated and (apparently) impossible for me.

On a positive note, there is more than one way to fix a cake.

StrawberryWartyCake

Just because something is ugly does not mean it tastes bad!
(and visa-versa)
♥  TTFN  ♥