How Do YOU Pick ‘Em?

March 20, 2017March 19, 2017 ~ JodiLea

Not the horses. trophys

I’m talking about Oscar winners. Is it just me, or does the Academy nominate more people for each category now? More movies were up for Best Picture this year than usual.

I used to pick the winners based on who I wanted to win, Soon it was obvious that I did not share similar tastes with the Academy.

Next I tried to be logical. I would get a copy of the nominee list and figure out the actor and actress who starred in the movie I decided had the most chance for Best Picture. This method would have worked better if I didn’t suck at picking Best Picture.

I rarely see any nominated films before the award ceremony. This could be a significant factor – or not. Who really knows how the Academy selects the winners anyway. Their decisions amaze and anger me most of the time.

Considering the ridiculous choices the Academy occasionally makes it would not surprise me to find out the Academy members rarely watch every movie in question. Each member picks out a film to watch and writes an in-depth report on it. All members then meet to compare notes at a dark, dive-quality bar, and drink whiskey until they giggle like little girls. At that point they draw straws and the loser has to take everyone’s report and make up the nominees on the fly.

The week before the ceremony, our esteemed Academy returns to the dive-bar to decide on the winners. Pieces of paper with a nominee’s name on them are taped to the dart board. The first paper to get nailed with a dart is the winner. The later it gets, the longer it takes to pick the winner using darts, because the Academy members are overly whiskeyed by this time.

If the designated record keeper forgets to record any results from the pierced paper choices, it all has to be done over. If the Academy failed to appoint a “record keeper” to begin with, they appoint the waitress with the largest breasts to keep score.

After all, this is Hollywood.

She, Who Does Not Fetch

March 18, 2017 ~ JodiLea

I want to sit at my computer, sipping coffee all day and write. My Novel is nearing another editing phase and I need to bring all the ends together. Things get ignored – housework, my hubby, my dog. Hubby is busy with his own happy things and barely notices, but my puppy needs way more attention. Or she’s tearing up things she knows she shouldn’t just to get it.

If I use my laptop and sit in the family room she is content to lay next to my chair and just hang. But a puppy can only hang for so long. Suddenly it’s football rodeo time. She is running willy-nilly, crouching down, springing up, attacking her futon. Then she tosses her stuffed football and catches it a few times before flinging it my way.

Nothing can get one’s attention better than getting bopped in the head by a stuffed football. So of course I toss the ball back to her, and she watches it fall to the floor in front of her. Then she looks up at me to see what I’ll do next. She, who does not fetch.

It’s a Bernese Mountain Dog trait – not fetching. They are above the whole go-get-it-and-bring-it-back thing. They believe if we toss it away, we don’t want it. If I do want it, I can just go get it myself.

If I feel like it, I will go and pick up the toy and toss it to her again. She watches me intently. She has no desire to play ball again, but my behavior must amuse her, because she smiles and wags her tail. No doubt thinking “what an idiot!”

After 2 1/2 years, last night I got it. I knew I got it because I recognized the joy on Ziva’s face that happens when I understand what she wants. I too get excited. You have to be there, ya know?

I’ll get to the point.

Last night I tossed Ziva her round stuffed ball (football season is over now) and she caught it, flipped her head back and tossed it right back at me. I had time to catch it and toss it back her direction. It was a bit high – no problem for her, she jumped and grabbed it, tossing it in one quick motion and I missed it. I am not as gifted and flexible as my pup.

I retrieved the ball from under the dining room table and tossed it. Ziva ignored it. Although she was still wagging her tail and smiling – the spell had broken. The ball had literally dropped. Game over. Until she decides to start another one.

She, who does play catch.

♥ TTFN ♥

Ranting At Marvel Studios

March 16, 2017 ~ JodiLea

A copy of Entertainment Weekly arrived in the mail yesterday. At first, I was excited to see the name “Thor” taking up most of the cover. Another movie! A tall guy that I did not recognize and two bad-ass chicks were on the cover.

As I read the article, however, my excitement quickly turned into disbelief then anger.

HOW COULD THEY RUIN THOR?!?

Since I was a little girl Thor was my favorite hero. Every superhero had their own movie (or two or five) it seemed, except Thor. Why didn’t Thor have a movie? This baffled me through childhood and beyond.

After YEARS of waiting, Thor is released in 2011. I must admit that he was worth waiting for. In 2013 Thor:Dark World was even more exciting. (Is it hot in here, or is it me?)

I will be boycotting Thor:Ragnarok. I couldn’t bear to watch the horror unfold. The Entertainment Weekly reporter, Tim Stack, put it, “Sometimes even superheroes need a makeover”.

Maybe other superheros, Tim. But NOT Thor. NO, NO, NO!! My stunningly handsome hero now looks like every other rugged blond actor popping up in Hollywood lately. You know, the leading men in action movies who have short military style haircuts and have between a 3-day and 3-month growth of facial hair? I get most of their names mixed up because they all look the same. Thor should never look the same! Why doesn’t this new director, Taika Waititi, get that?

Give Loki a makeover! He still has his greasy flat hair. Shave his head or given him a spiky mohawk and spare his brother.

Ruining Thor’s looks was not enough for this crazy guy. He took Thor’s girlfriend AND his trusty hammer away from him. Then, a road-trip with (wait for it … ) the Hulk is on the agenda.

Ha! Thor and Hulk on a road-trip does sound fun, even I can see that. Who knows – I may even watch the movie someday. Out of curiosity, you understand.

But I am NOT going to like it.

♥ TTFN ♥