Why Men Are Happier People

I found this list in an old folder titled “Inspiration”. I do not know who I thought it would inspire, but there is a ring of truth about it…

 

WHY MEN ARE HAPPIER PEOPLE

Your last name stays put. 

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack…

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.

New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood, all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, He or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice about growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman.

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to name more than 20 of these items.

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

~~~~~~~~~  ***  ~~~~~~~~~

I honestly laughed out loud after reading that last one!

 

♥  TTFN  ♥

Photo credit: (license)

Toto, We Aren’t in OZ Anymore

As I write this, I look out my office window at a world that is black and white. Snow has piled up for 3 days now, and any green on the pine and cedar trees is hidden by clumps of snow and the trees themselves are dark brown to black. A photo reveals a white background, broken up by a forest of tall patio umbrellas

There is no sign of this changing anytime soon.

I did not realize how much color mattered to me – until I found myself in a colorless world. Remember in the movie? Dorothy left black & white Kansas and landed in a wildly, intimidatingly, glaring splashes of color world.  I certainly do not want OZ to be my world, but a little yellow and lavender would be nice.

Every weekend this month has been snowy. We- (I say “we” but really it is my hubby Bruce doing the work, because of my health), has gotten a path to the road dug out during the week, only to watch it fill back up on Friday.
This week the storm is throwing snow harder and 24/7. You can no longer see where hubby dug out yesterday so our son’s family could get into the driveway. I think they could be stuck here awhile because the town snowplow only makes it up here every other day. So, even if hubby cranks up the snow-blower – we are stuck in this winter wonderland for the time being.

Church was cancelled this morning. I guess that is common up here in the mountains, but it’s new to me. I got an email from one of the Elders letting me know. God must be OK with it though, since it is His doing. I imagine that even Jehovah likes a snow day – every now and again.  I’m glad I don’t have his job! But I digress…

The kids are so excited about playing in the snow. I don’t play with them because I am recovering from a sinus infection and not too quickly. My cough worries my 2-year-old granddaughter, Mary. Every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose, she asks, “Are you OK, Grandma?”  Truth be told, the concern on her sweet little face cheers me up a lot.

I sure wanted to be outside with her yesterday when she was struggling to make snow angels. The younger, healthier me would have flung myself backwards into the snow bank and flapped my arms and legs until I sunk a few inches. I felt sad that I did not dare to do it.  She had a blast trying though – which was the point.   

You can’t tell by the photos, but she has a big smile on her face.

After breakfast, this morning, the troops bundled up and attempted to overcome the snow, however the opposite is happening. Mary’s older brother, Aiden, shovels snow to make a path down the slope of the driveway, only to turn around and see the snowflakes piling up behind him. Ten more minutes of that and the snow wins. Time to warm up in Grandpa’s shop (that is equipped with a wood burning stove and a fridge with drinks and snacks. Oh yea, and a DVD friendly TV.) I have not seen the flash of Mary’s bright neon-pink gloves or yellow hat for a while, so I figured that was where they all were.

And the snowflakes keep on coming.

Pennsylvania needs a new groundhog. Punxsutawney Phil is a liar!

 

♥  TTFN  ♥

Highway Reality Show?

Hello!
A gal I know passed along this video to me and I HAD to share it with Y’all. I watched it an hour ago and my mouth is still hanging open.  It reminded me of this selfie my cousin Luke and his friend took. You will see why!

Car Cam Footage

After watching the video, if you take a moment to send me a short comment about what you thought about it, I will be so grateful!!

Thanks,

Jodi Lea

♥  TTFN  ♥