Bust a Move? More Like Bust a Hip…

July 2, 2011 ~ JodiLea

Electric Robot

OK. It’s official. I’ve lost my mind.

If that’s not bad enough, it has been replaced with a mind that is 20-something years old. I don’t know how (or why) this happened.

I admit I am enjoying some fresh thinking, and taking a vacation from the worn out tapes my former mind played. Some days it’s scary, though. Like the day I caught myself watching COPS!. And I have this thing for Lucky Charms lately. I would call for help, but beside the Ghostbusters, who would I call? My medical doctor, my gyno, or my therapist? So far it has been… interesting around here.

Since turning 20-something I have been staying up later, agonizing over what to wear to work, and wearing more make-up. Make-up is a waste of time, because no matter how much I plaster on, I don’t look 20-something. I keep trying new beauty products and hoping something magical will occur. Denial can be an expensive alternative to reality. (Just ask my very happy Mary Kay lady.)

What really SUCKS is that my body is 30-years older than I am.

Think about it. Aside from the obvious downfalls (vanity, pride, and more vanity), it’s dangerous. 20-somethings don’t think twice about rushing around in a hurry to get things done, skipping meals, doing yard-work for 5 hours straight, spending hours on their feet. Us 50-somethings pay dearly for this behavior -and usually pain is involved.

20-somethings (mostly girls, but not always) love to listen to loud music and dance while they work around the house. I do this. My former mind did not like hip-hop, so my iPod was lacking any such music last week, when I got the urge to “bust a move”. So I did what any 20-something would do in this crisis situation. I blasted the stereo. To heck with the neighbors – they make noise more than I do!

Oh man, that was fun! I thought I was moving so fine, until I caught my reflection in the mirror. This girl is not ready for prime time, in fact I thought I saw a rusty old robot shorting out in my hutch. I felt like one too. Luckily my chiropractor had an opening right away. I’m so glad I changed my mind about the break dancing.

I bet my guardian angel is exhausted. I know I am.

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Goodbye

June 25, 2011December 3, 2012 ~ JodiLea

June 25th, 2011

Dear Diary,

It’s been over a month now and I am sick of quitting smoking. I am also getting sick of blogging about it, so I bet you are sick of reading it. You may have a longer attention span than I do (most likely), so you may not be bored out of your mind -yet.

Enough is enough! I want to move on.

Before I do that, I want to thank y’all for your loving support of my journey and your encouraging comments. Believe me when I say that you helped me get this far. A month is huge in an addicts time zone 🙂

Thank You

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Week 5 Begins

June 17, 2011December 3, 2012 ~ JodiLea ~ 3 Comments

June 17th, 2011

Dear Diary,

This could be the toughest one yet. My hubby will be out-of-town all weekend and I will be left home alone. Unsupervised.

Well, I won’t be totally alone. The Bitch (a.k.a. my addiction), will be an uninvited house guest. She will be hovering close to me, whispering sweet lies that my addicted brain wants to believe. Things like “Oh come on, you deserve a ‘free day’ “, or “No one will ever know if you have a couple smokes”.

When she gets desperate, the Bitch starts throwing old issues at me, excavated from my traumatic past. Nothing is too low of a blow for the Bitch. ” It’s too late now, you’re old and the damage has been done “, ” If you can’t smoke anymore, which addiction will you turn to next?”, “Hasn’t your poor family been through enough?” The more desperate she gets, the nastier her ranting (inside my head) becomes.

What the Bitch doesn’t know is that I have a plan of attack. I’m going to strap on my iPod and rock & roll while spring cleaning. I call it spring cleaning because I’m going to pull everything out of the drawers, closets, and shelves. I will pack up what I want to move and get rid of what I don’t want. I will clean before I put the stuff back. This activity will be exhausting.

Next I will put on my pajamas, get my popcorn bowl, and start the Soap Marathon.

I have 8 days (16 episodes) of my soaps waiting for me on the DVR. Hubby hates listening to The Young and Restless & The Bold and Beautiful. I don’t know if he hates the shows, or my behavior. I admit that I sometimes yell at the characters when they are being incredibly stupid. There are many bitches (and bastards) to hate, root for, and scream at. If you’re looking for entertainment that takes you completely away from reality – you should check them out.

During Soap Intermission I plan to call my best friend and see what she’s up to. I will try to talk her into visiting me out here in California where it’s tornado and flood free. That girl knows me more than anyone else. Except God, and He may consult her for all I know..

When all the soaps have been watched and I touch base with my BFF, I may do some gardening, organize photos, clippings, announcements, and the what-not I’ve been saving to put into a scrapbook someday. Or I may take a nap. The choice is mine.

And NOT the Bitches!

😉