What It Is, Man

I promised that this Thursday’s Giggles & Bits post would reveal the mystery of  “What Can It Be?”

CheeseCake

Sorry dear readers, but it is not a tortilla. Quite a few of you guessed that one and if I didn’t know better I would have guessed that too. One reader thought it was foam on an Orange Julius – a fabulous guess, but alas, you are wrong.

A backed away from the pan view, reveals my latest culinary disaster: WartyCake

This is supposed to be a white birthday cake.  Every ingredient is edible. I followed the recipe to the letter. My kids may not believe it, but I did everything the recipe called for, without any substitutions. It was a very picky recipe that took using four mixing bowls so you did not mix ingredients until it said so.  No recipe ever told me to grind (in a food processor) granulated sugar before, but I did it. I did everything correctly.
And this is the thanks I get…
I had just cleaned my oven last week so the window on the oven door was sparkly. Meaning I had a perfect view into the oven where I watched in horror while lumps and bumps began rising out of the once smooth batter. I bet that this was not the expected behavior. My not-so-lovely cake had warts and craters. At some angles it looked like the surface of the moon.

As I agonized and whined, hubby laughed. By the time it finished baking I had giggled a few times myself, while vowing to never be caught without a Betty Crocker cake mix in my pantry. Making cakes from scratch is overrated and (apparently) impossible for me.

On a positive note, there is more than one way to fix a cake.

StrawberryWartyCake

Just because something is ugly does not mean it tastes bad!
(and visa-versa)
♥  TTFN  ♥

When Dinner Looks Back At You

This afternoon I got into a rare domestic mood and cleaned! Then, as if that wasn’t enough, I decided to actually cook something.

I had a huge chicken breast in the fridge and red potatoes in my pantry. I even had vegetables for a great salad. Hubby will be pleasantly surprised.

First thing, I needed to chop the breast into four pieces (that’s how large the thing was!). Then I got out .the Jamaican Rub I bought in town at the flea market.   I rubbed olive oil into the chicken then rubbed the rub in. I wrapped them up to marinate. I was feeling pretty proud of myself for getting a head-start on dinner instead of my usual M.O. of late – to whip up any old thing I had around.

Next, I got the 5-lb bag of potatoes from the pantry. Funny, but I bought them two weeks ago, and there were already “eyes” peeking out from the air-holes in the plastic bag. When I let the potatoes roll out of the bag and into the sink, I screamed and jumped back. I know I will have nightmares about all those hideous evil eyes looking up at me in a sinister way. I should have chucked them all and made rice, but those who know me understand how stubborn I am. Besides I wanted roasted potatoes cooked on the grill, so maybe I could sit and relax for just a few minutes. It never happens, but as an optimist I keep planning it.

EyesCloseUp

Every single potato had large bulging eyes, and on top of those, more bulging eyes. There were so many eyes the potatoes looked like they had spiny flowers growing out of them. The flowers were greenish-red and hairy, but I knew it wasn’t hair. I could not bring myself to touch them.

I stood there at the sink , staring back at my dinner, debating whether I should wash them first, or start hacking out eyes. I washed them first, after all they were already in the sink.

.

.

HackingEyes

Then with my trusty chopping knife and a potato peeler, I managed to find 5 potatoes that had more potato than eyes. After cubing them and mixing with butter and garlic salt, I double-wrapped them in foil. I cleaned the hacked up remains from the counters and handed the plate of chicken and the foil-wrapped potatoes to hubby to BBQ.

I’m sure that hubby enjoyed eating those potatoes, way more than I did. A true case of “Ignorance is Bliss”.

Moral of this story? Do not buy potatoes in bags. Pick potatoes one at a time.  😉

10 Things I’ve Learned Since Moving To The Mountains

  1. Food takes longer to cook at high elevations.
  2. Propane stoves cook hotter than gas stoves.
  3. And no, this does not even things out.
  4. You can’t cook pinto beans in a crock pot here – they will not soften, no matter how many days you keep them in there.
  5. Contrary to popular belief  (OK –mine), bears do not meditate in the woods.
  6. Just because you live surrounded by trees and forest land doesn’t mean you’ve seen the last of 100+ degree temperatures OR humidity.
  7. There are no street lights on mountain roads.
  8. There are trillions of night insects – and they are freakishly noisy.
  9. The Sierra Mountain dirt has ore in it, and it’s penetrating rust color does not wash out all the way.
  10. If you want the shelves stocked and your senior discount at the one and only market in town, you have to shop on Wednesdays.