Gee, Thanks For Letting Me Keep Some

April 8, 2013 ~ JodiLea ~ 4 Comments

Dear IRS,
I’ll be sending you half of my inheritance next week. I must have done something wrong because I could not find a loop-hole, or any exemption to prevent getting nailed with the maximum capital gains tax.

Please, insist the federal government spend my inheritance wisely. I don’t want to find out that my dear mother’s trust funded something she would disapprove of. And if I were you, I wouldn’t piss her off.

Oh, and FYI – I will NOT be sending you money every quarter next year, so forget those voucher thingys. Everyone who could leave me money is dead. I retired and my pension is notably less than my former income. You’ll have to look for a different grieving heir.

Now that I think about it, you may want to put some of my inheritance in reserve – you’ll be sending ME money next year.

Sincerely,

A Tax-Payer

Driving Mister Daisy

April 7, 2013April 6, 2013 ~ JodiLea ~ 1 Comment

I no longer have pity for Morgan Freeman. At least he was not married to Miss Daisy. AND – he got paid to drive her butt around.

I, however, am married to Mister Daisy (a.k.a. Hubby). Who does not thank me for driving him around, let alone pay me. I don’t want to rant about hubby too much. He is not a happy man with only 1/4 of his vision, and I get that.

So, I’m just going to explain (in a non-ranting way) how our lives are going these days.

Mr. Daisy hates me driving him around. He wants to do all the driving himself, but he is not allowed to since his eye surgery.

He doesn’t trust my driving ability. He hates staying awake on long trips because he wants to navigate me. Sure, I get lost and turned around sometimes, but I think this is what they call “the blind leading the blind”. It’s amazing we get anywhere.

The longer our drive, the “snippier” he gets. My TMJ is flaring up from the stress of keeping my mouth shut and trying not to cry. I don’t handle snippy very well.

My lack of depth-perception alarms Mr. Daisy greatly. He says I’m “running off the road”. I say he’s not used to being on the right-side of the car. I know from personal experience that things look a lot scarier from there. He swears he feels tires leaving the road.

I don’t argue anymore. I just say “whoops!” and hope it pisses him off.

😉

I REALLY Am the April Fool

April 6, 2013April 6, 2013 ~ JodiLea

Whoops! All of the links on this post did not work until tonight (3-days after publishing it). This was not an April-Fools Day joke on my part, but an extreme lack of proofreading in my anxiousness to get some sleep.

My deepest apologies, dear readers.

All links are fixed now. Thank you for your patience 🙂

APRIL 2013

Monthly Observances

National Child Abuse Prevention Month

Stress Awareness Month

National Humor Month

Observance Days

Apr 1^st: If you don’t remember this one – YOU are the fool (along with me)

Apr 7^th: World Health Day

Apr. 11^th: National Alcohol Screening Day

Apr. 14^th: International Moment of Laughter Day