Sh*t Happens

Whoever came up with the  “Sh*t Happens”  logo has to know us.

It’s been awhile since I have posted. Sh*t Happened. Again.

Last week, we were out-of-town attending a funeral.  While visiting with family over the weekend, hubby’s retina started to detach itself from his left-eye. He suspected this may be happening, because his other retina detached eight-years ago, and you tend to remember crap like that.

He had an emergency exam by a local Ophthalmologist, who told us that  we needed to get hubby home and into surgery, ASAP.

A dilemma because I can’t drive his big-assed truck.  Well… I suppose I could drive it, but it would be like “Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride”. I have very little depth perception and a deep-seated fear of driving in places I don’t know.  My sense of direction is so bad that even with my GPS unit, “Tom”,  I still manage to get myself  lost.

Hubby’s sister, my hero, saved our butts by driving us home (a nine-hour drive). She drove all day Sunday, and on Monday she drove us to Stockton and then to Sacramento where the retinal surgery center was.

It was a tricky surgery – his detached retina had 5 rips in it. His surgeon explained to us hubby’s eye was filled with oil, to help keep the retina in place while it healed. In 3-4 months they will remove the oil during his second surgery.

Say WHAT??? Monday’s surgery will cause a cataract to grow in his eye.  How lovely.  Something to look forward to this summer.

Once home, we tucked hubby into bed. The retinal re-attachment surgery is the first step to healing. Now hubby has to lay face down 3-5 days to keep the oil  floating against the retina to make it heal in place. His back already is killing him from being in that position.

So – hubby’s hurting, sleep deprived, and bored out of his mind. Can’t read or watch TV. No morning walks. He is also suffering withdrawal from his Sudoku puzzle addiction. This is not a happy time for him. Or his wife.

Oh man, is he grumpy!

To compound his grumpiness, I keep nagging reminding him to keep his head bent down, and annoying him by trying to anticipate his every need. I’m probably on his last nerve, and it’s only post-op day 3.

Yet – he wants to go to the Post Office with me tomorrow. ‘Just to get out of the house’, he says. I know it’s really because he thinks I’ll get lost.  I may not have driven in this town or anywhere since last July when we moved in.

However, I think I can find my way down the mountain better than a blind guy.   Then again, sh*t happens.

A Death in the Family

Normally I write about frivolous things with smart-ass humor, or climb up on my soap box and rant good and loud. This post is different.

My sister Melanie and I said good-bye to our terminally ill mother last spring. We leaned on one another during the months we took care of her, and then as we carried out her last wishes. We had lost our father in 1993 and now it was just the two of us. Being “the writer” of the family it fell to me to write mom’s obituary. It had to be perfect. I struggled for 3 days on the thing until I couldn’t find anything more to re-write. That and I had the thing memorized.

If you have ever had the misfortune to write one, I’m sure you know exactly what I mean.  How do you sum up somebody’s entire life? Especially someone you have known and loved your whole life. Writing a stranger’s obituary would be so much easier. Just the facts. No memories. No emotions.

Last month I got a phone call – Melanie died. WTF??  How could she just die in her sleep like that? She’s my younger sister. The second shock was the cause of her death. The coroner explained to me that Mel was healthy – except she had advanced stages of coronary artery disease. Her arteries were so blocked that her poor heart simply gave out. I can almost hear my mom holler, “Well, SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!”.  Mom always did get to the point.

So, here I sit sweating over another obituary. Mel’s memorial will be on the 16th, and tonight is my self-inflicted deadline. At 10:08 PM (PDT) I stopped fussing with the copy, closed my eyes and sent my sister’s obit and photo to our local newspaper, and a Bay Area newspaper. Maybe some of her former classmates/co-workers/buddies will see it and drop by.

I hope so – Mel deserves that.