The person who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.
— Chinese proverb
I should have this proverb tattooed on the top of my right hand. So I would see it every day and remember this simple, but very important concept.
It is in my nature to have a great idea and go full steam ahead with it – expecting to create or change whatever it is, in an impossible time frame. Then… I get overwhelmed. When I am overwhelmed, I become stuck, the task is too large and I don’t know where or how to begin. So I don’t do anything at all and feel like a failure.
I am an intelligent, mature person. Why do I insist on making things harder on myself? If three therapists over the years can’t help me answer that question…
I have several ‘mountains’ I want to move these days. Each one requires patience, perseverance and a lot of time. They should not be done in haste, or, as my folks called it, half-assed, because they are important to me. No boss or taskmaster is looking over my shoulder, or anxiously waiting for these mountains to get moved. The only ones who give a flying hoot about these things are Me, Myself, and I.
You would think I could give myself a break! Sometimes I do. Then taking a break from one, leaves room for working on another one. Therefore, I am floating in the breeze, not getting anything finished.
You may have noticed this, my dear reader, but my blog posts are few these days. And yes, I know they are boring – a fact I plan on correcting.
Oh wait! That’s another mountain, isn’t it?
This addict diary series began in May of 2011 when I quit smoking. Every now and then I post an ‘update’ for self-therapy and interested followers…
Dear Diary & Dearest Readers,
Well, I have wanted to smoke lately. This is a warning signal that I’m becoming increasingly stressed. In the past, I would try to hide from stress with a martini and a cigarette (or two… or twenty…).
Once an addict, always an addict. My knee-jerk reaction to stress is nicotine. My brain knows it won’t help, but cell memory (and The Bitch) are calling me.
Don’t pick up that phone!
Whatever stress I have will pass – but one cigarette will lead to a thousand more. And I know what I’m talking about. I have personally researched this more than a few times, and I hope that you, smokers and non, can benefit from my experience.
Any new non-smokers struggling with The Bitch? Don’t be discouraged to hear she shows up even after 2-years. Her evil powers diminish as you gain time, but she keeps trying anyway. She’s a very stubborn Bitch.
Remember the “STOP THINKING!!” technique? So simple, and it really works. Try it yourself sometime to stop thoughts you should not dwell on. You don’t even have to throw a tantrum for it to work, but it is cathartic.
And fun too. 🙂
Stay tuned for uncommon reason’s to stay smoke-free…
Remember that little song? I have not thought about it, or Tiny Tim, in decades. Until this morning.
I was talking to my sister’s fiancé, who called to give me the news about our probate lawyer quitting the firm. Now the case will be taken over by another lawyer when he gets “up to speed”. Great. Continue reading “Tip-Toeing Through The Tulips”