Author: JodiLea

I don't pretend to be who/what I'm not. I will be honest here unless I publish under the category "This could be news," which is 99% fiction and a wee bit sarcastic. ;-) I want readers who come here to have as much fun as I do. Not all subjects can be fun, but most can be funny if I do my job right ;-) My inner child is reflected in my logo and will change at a moment's notice.

An Open Letter to My Addiction (a.k.a. The Bitch)

~ JodiLea ~ 5 Comments

Dear Bitch,

Two years and three months have gone by without smoking a cigarette. My lungs can take some hiking now, and my asthma is like a childhood memory.

I smell pretty now – instead of like an ashtray.

I rarely think about smoking anymore, and when I do, I think how great it is to be free from nicotine.

And, then, from out of nowhere comes a flashback of lighting up and taking a drag. My subconscious grabs this image and decides, “a cigarette would be so good now!”

But I am wise to the sneaky-assed tactics you use to manipulate my mind. You are clever, I’ll give you that. You have all my buttons memorized and on your speed-dial.

English: Image of the insulaYou can even get me to question what I know is the truth. How you torture me!

Is your real name Insula? I have read that damage to the Insula in the brain will stop addiction to cigarette smoking. Well. Isn’t that special?  Deep down I think I suspected this all along…

In order to get rid of you once and for all, I must have a lobotomy.

You truly ARE a Bitch!!

Beyond Bored

~ JodiLea ~ 1 Comment

BabyYawning  The Daily Prompt is ‘YAWN’. What bores you?

GOLF. Watching a golf match on TV has to be the most boring thing, ever. Apologies to those who love to play/watch golf, but it had to be said. If forced to watch (I know, right? But it happens!) it is only tolerable if I am sewing, knitting or crocheting while doing so.

When I think about it, I am rarely bored. My handwork makes a lot of things tolerable for me. Like airports. Road trips. Waiting rooms. American Rifleman – hubby watches this show because he likes old guns, but he agrees that the host speaks very, let’s say non-enthusiastically.

FL-Golfcourse
Hey!  Where is the ball? Where is the golfer?

Maybe golf in the deep south is a bit more exciting…

I am an intense and hyperactive person. I cannot sit still and do nothing. Doing handwork will actually help me slowdown and relax – something everyone from family members to doctors,  keep telling me to do.

I have friends who love golf. Go figure. They tell me it relaxes them and I should try it.

I just nod, smile, and continue knitting.
.
.
photo credit: wiccked via photopin cc

photo credit: lincolnblues via photopin cc

Was That a Real 49er Game?

~ JodiLea ~ 1 Comment

I wasn’t expecting this – it didn’t even feel like football.  49er-logo

Now I’ve been in the mood for football for months. This week I have worn all of my 49er shirts. Today I was so jazzed about tonight’s game that I reminded everyone I dealt with while running errands in town to watch it.  Most people had no clue pre-season was even starting and I was happy to fill them in.

Then, as I watched the game, it didn’t feel real to me. Something wasn’t right, maybe a few things even. Get this – I was more bothered by the fact it didn’t feel like football, then watching Denver beat us.

See what I mean? That is not me.

I planned to post about tonight’s game, but I didn’t have anything interesting to say. I’m staring at the blank “New Post” form, uninspired. And then, as if a lightening bolt zapped my brain, I FIGURED IT OUT!  It’s not often that I am struck by sudden insight (or lightening), so I had to take a break and do a little happy dance, then get myself a soda before returning to my blank post and telling y’all about it.  😉

Reasons tonight’s game did not feel right:

  1. Who are those people?  The only player’s I knew played in the 1st possession. Then they left the field and strangers came on. I knew there were new player’s and rookies coming aboard, that happens every year. I don’t remember so many new names and faces all at once. Am I getting old, or are we firing more people in the off-season?
  2. What happened to Coach?  He looks like Jim Harbaugh, but he’s either been swapped out by aliens or put on some serious medication.
  3. Where are the fans?  Have the stadium folks started selling the Candlestick Park’s seats already?  So sad to see so many empty spaces…
  4. Film Crew.  Someone please tell the cameraman that he’s supposed to be filming the game and not the cheerleaders. This must be pre-season for cheerleaders also – there were so freaking many of them.
  5. Peyton Manning.  If I wanted to constantly see all his stats, interviews and re-winded plays, I’d be a Bronco’s fan.

Whew! I feel better now. Thanks for listening.  🙂

TTFN