Mother Nature is playing an April Fool’s trick on us mountain folks today.
She has quite the blizzard going on. Everything is covered in white and the snowflakes keep coming down.
Not that you can see the delicate ones on video. The big fat flakes hide when they see me with a camera. Even the delicate ones stop after I record them. If I go about my sewing or writing as usual – they come back. They know I love watching them fall and they tease me mercilessly….
So much for doing the Tuesday grocery shopping. And the weather-guessers are saying this will go on until Thursday. Even though I didn’t have plans to go anywhere else, and I’m a homebody at heart, I feel eerily trapped.
Glad I have plenty of soup and edible stuff in the pantry! And, if the power stays on, all is well 😉
A dear sis-in-law of mine passed along some critical information that I found extremely helpful, so of course I have to share it with y’all…
Anonymous Man
Rules that every man wants you (his woman) to remember:
[ All are numbered #1 on purpose]
1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU’RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT’S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON’T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE: SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK! STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK! OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK! JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT’S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU’RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON’T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH. IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE…
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS.. PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY ‘NOTHING,’ WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING’S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON’T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE…REALLY.
1. DON’T ASK US WHAT WE’RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS SPORTS OR FIREARMS.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This explains a lot, doesn’t it?
Maybe we need to come up with a list of our own rules, ladies. If you know of any – please send them to me! I will be happy to put together a list we can vote on.
And men, don’t be shy! You probably most of the women rules already. 😉
I must say this upfront, in case you are new to my blog – I am not a scientist, nor physicist.
( My long-time readers can stop laughing now …)
Yet, I have proven this chaos theory many times over the years. In fact, I am doing so this week, in my very own office, just trying to move back in.
Somehow, despite all the cabinets and shelves my office has now, there is not enough room for everything designated to be there. SIGH. This turns the fun in putting things away, to dreaded decision-making. About my stuff crap.
Yes, I have gathered much, over the past 50 years, but I’ve only held on to the most precious crap. Then, my mother and sister move on to their eternal rest, and stick me with their precious crap. My inner-teen whines, “this is just SO unfair!”, as I go through boxes of precious family crap and realize I must keep a lot of it for historical and sentimental reasons. It is my duty as the only survivor.
I cannot part with the boxes of genealogical research, and reference documents my mom worked with before she became ill. They, combined with my hubby’s mom’s research, may help me discover the (missing) link between our individual Richardson family trees. If nothing else, there are some great things in there for a novel…
OK. I decide to put all the family research on the top shelf. It won’t be in the way there – I can’t reach the shelf under it without a step-stool. The shelf I can reach, is the ‘staging’ area for the upper shelves until hubby emerges from his shop, or wherever he is at the moment, and puts them up for me.
Yesterday, hubby shocked me with the news that he needed some file space in my office too. What!?! It turned out he only needed 5 hanging folders, but he scared me. He has most of his files in the shop’s filing cabinet, but wanted to keep personal files in the house. I gave him permission, what the Hell. Someday, I may need a square foot of shop space. For what, I don’t know. But it’s good to be prepared. The Military Girl Scouts taught me that.
Spring has sprung up here – the days are getting warmer, the bees are wildly spreading pollen, and the squirrels are flirting and chasing each other. I would normally be out on the deck with my laptop, re-writing chapter five of my novel, but I need to gather all the boxes that waited around in closets and the garage for me to put them away. Hubby wants to park in there – this year.
Then, the chaos should reach its peak, and in a few days, my little office will officially be open for business!
Jodi Lea's Place 