Post Re-Run: My War on Tags

Original post published 11/10/2010 

I have very sensitive skin and I hate the way garment tags are always scratching & making me itch. In the old days if a tag bugged you, you simply borrowed your mom’s seam ripper out of her sewing box and removed a few stitches. Wa-Lah! Problem solved.

Things have changed. Not only do you have an annoying tag that is double sewed into your garment, but you may have 3 or 4 of them. Apparently one tag is not enough to convey all the manufacturer wants you to know. This information is so critical that they sew it not once, but twice into the garment.

Last week I bought some new “skinny” jeans. Even though I knew the size they claimed to be was a lie (I have never, nor will I ever be a size 4), I felt so svelte & sexy.  I changed into them as soon as I got home from the store, called 2 friends and made them guess what size jeans I was wearing, curled up on the couch with a good book and some snacks – hey I was skinny, I can eat! An hour later the jeans had to come off. I could not take the tags anymore. They were terrorizing my skin and I just wanted to scream. I think I did scream.

For a half-hour I painstakingly removed the little tiny stitches, and the ones under those, to free my fabulous new jeans of their gnarly parasites. After all that toil, the tag was still attached to my pants. They must be sewing them in 3 times these days. I sigh deeply and loudly cursed, then proceeded with my task. I spend another 15 minutes removing the little secret stitches, which by the way held a seam together, so now I have an hole in my brand new jeans. Oh- and yes, the tag remains.

Maybe you know this already, but I was naive and believed that I was only dealing with thread here. But no. The BASTARDS are now using GLUE. Tags are sealed to the garment by gluing them after they are sewn in. I still fume when I think about it.

OK, we get the fact you want the tag to remain with the garment. But why can’t you make a tag that is not scratchy? The garment is not scratchy, so obviously you have the technology. And what is the deal with tags so large you can write the Constitution on them? Or the five, count them five, tags sewn into one small (size 4 don’t ya know) pair of jeans? Three in the back, one in the front, and one on the outside seam below the hip.

The only person who sees these damn tags is me, and I am not happy with whoever made the garment.

And I know who you are. You made sure of that, didn’t you?

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Month 5

October 20th, 2011 – 5 months clean

Dear Diary,
I am losing my mind. I can’t get cigarettes out of my stupid head.

Addiction Poster
The Bitch

Lately I think about smoking often throughout the day. The Bitch (my addiction), has been relentless and I feel my stamina eroding. Month 2 was not this bad. I started feeling sorry for myself a couple of weeks ago. Now I’m becoming resentful and bitter. Such fun to be around me.

I have been down this road before and I recognize the self-destructive thoughts and behaviors that come before a relapse. No matter how stubborn I am, no amount of “will-power” is going to save me. The only reason I have not bought a pack of Virginia Slims Menthol this week is not wanting to smoke around my granddaughter – she would not only nag me, but tattle on me as well. There are also a lot of folks rooting for me that I don’t want to disappoint.

I could enjoy one and I’d be able to focus… One with my morning cup of coffee to clear my head… Just a couple drags won’t be a big deal… No one will have to know…

In the substance abuse world, those thoughts are called “romancing the drug” and I have been brought down by their lies before. I can fight back with the STOP technique and remain fairly sane.

What I fear the most are the darker thoughts that come when my defenses are weak and something upsets me: To Hell with this… I can’t fight this anymore… No one gives a shit about what I do, unless they don’t like it…

The official term for this is “having the fuck-its”. (My doctor uses this term so it must be official)  It is the most dangerous emotional state of mind for anyone to be in, but it can mean life or death to an addict.

If you arrive at the fuck-its take action immediately! Stop thinking and call a friend, get out of the house, take a break from work. Stay home in your jammies and read a good book or watch soaps. Pamper yourself. Sleep. Meditate. Pray. If you’re hyperactive (like I am) take advantage and clean your house, cupboards, something. Anything but give up!

I know this is easy to say, and nearly impossible to do, when you are pissed off at everything and tired of fighting with yourself and your addiction. I have personal experience with the fuck-its. I relapsed back into a pack-a-day habit after being clean for 10-years. 10 years!

I am not trying to frighten or lecture here. Only want to pass on what I’ve learned in case it could help someone else. And of course to vent, whine and dis The Bitch while I’m at it.

😉

I Don’t Remember Voting For That…

Is my memory getting bad, or did I miss the election where we voted about getting rid of “In God We Trust” on American money?

Wouldn’t there have  been a big hullabaloo months prior to voting? I do remember  how it was before we voted about gay marriage. So many phone calls, leaflets in the mail, TV and Radio ads. We were bombarded by everyone’s opinion every damned day.

Why didn’t hullabaloo happen about our money?  Because we the people didn’t get a say in the matter.  Something about separation of religion and government we were told. Oh poppycock! Our money doesn’t say “In Religion We Trust”. It has the word “God” on it.

When did “God” become an unmentionable word in the American language?  Hmmm… Oh wait – I know! When we started kissing the asses of every whiny group or organization that said America was infringing upon their right to not believe in Christianity– that’s when. How a dollar and change infringes anyone’s rights to their beliefs is puzzling to me, but by all means, let’s re-tool the mints and issue one dollar coins (because those Susan B. Anthony bucks were such a hit, ya know) that don’t have that word printed on them.

Why am I pissed off?  Because I learned how to say the pledge of allegiance in school, and we stood with our hands over our hearts and said it. Out loud. Every morning.  My granddaughters are denied the right to observe this American tradition. All because somebody was “offended”.

The ass kissing did not start, or stop at this trusting God on our money thing either.  America has been so busy trying to be diplomatic and not offending anyone, that we are infringing our own rights. We are shaping and changing our American traditions and culture to please others.

This scares me – a lot