Category: What Now?

Today may have been perfect if not for this.

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Phase 1

~ JodiLea ~ 1 Comment

Lit cigarette in ashtrayWednesday, May 12th

Dear Diary,

In Phase 1 of the Mayo Clinic program, they want you to start preparing yourself  for the Big Day. First, they had me write a list of all the reasons I want to quit smoking. That was easy. Next I got to make another list, this time of what things I plan to do instead of smoking. That list is much smaller- is that bad?

They also  suggest talking with my doctor about the various stop smoking aids available. I had heard about Chantix from my Southern CA doctor and I asked my Northern CA Doc to prescribe some for me. He wouldn’t do it. Too many dangerous side-effects of “mental episodes” and “suicidal urges”, he tells me.

I thought it was “mental episodes” and “suicidal urges” that I was trying to avoid by taking the damn pills. And what about the homicidal urges? Are these just going to go unchecked?  Quitting smoking can be hazardous to the health of those around you. At the very least, it isn’t pretty.

As I reach to click the Submit button for Phase 1 and start Phase 2, I suddenly pause.

Here they come. The addict’s thoughts. The ones that sabotage the thoughts I was having about stopping smoking. My addiction is a cunning and baffling Bitch. She messes with me by stirring up fear, dread, and self-doubt. She does everything she possibly can to keep me using nicotine.  She is  killing me.

I catch myself thinking I should wait and not pick a Quit Date yet. I don’t feel ready now. And work has been so intense and stressful… I realize it’s the Bitch talking, but she starts making sense if I don’t stop her.

Maybe Phase 2 can help me shut the Bitch up…

TTFN

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: The Beginning

~ JodiLea

Lit cigarette in ashtray

I became addicted to nicotine by having  just a few cigarettes.  Seriously!

I blame it on the fact that both my parents were chain smokers. You could say that I started smoking as a fetus, then spent my childhood surrounded by a dense cloud of second-hand smoke.  I was an addict waiting to happen. If I could go back to that day I bummed some cigarettes from my boyfriend, and not do it…

But I did do it. So here I am whining to y’all, because my husband and kids are sick of my love/hate relationship with nicotine, and I’m beginning the process of quitting.

If you are a normal person and have never been addicted to tobacco, or anything else for that matter, you may find my diary posts educational – who knows?  If you are also in my position (need to quit smoking), or you recently quit, please come along for the ride! I have the feeling it will be interesting either way…

Tuesday, May 10th
Dear Diary,
I am contemplating quitting cigarettes soon. I am even thinking of setting my “Quit Date” for May 20th. That would be giving myself a huge birthday present. Do I want to be miserable on my birthday? Of course not. Like I said – I am contemplating right now. the Mayo Clinic has a cool health website that has an on-line quit smoking program. Contemplating a Quit Date is the first step in the program.

All-righty then! I am done with my first assignment.  Cool.

Restaurant Review: Chelas

~ JodiLea

Chelas Logo

A new restaurant opened just down the hill from my mom’s house in Laguna Niguel. Sis and I have waited for them to open since August. We saw a sign on the vacant space last summer saying “Coming Soon! Chelas Mexican Grill” Yum! We love Mexican food.

When we walked in the door a heavenly aroma enveloped us. Our first impression was a mixture of “this is a fast food place!” and “OMG, it smells incredible!” Chelas menu is posted on the wall and you place your order at the counter. The interior walls are painted a light drab, and the vinyl flooring is black. They have chairs and tables available, and you can order food to go.

This was not what we expected.

The menu was far different from the Mexican restaurants we usually went to. No Enchiladas, Chili Rellaños, Soups, or Salads listed. What was on the menu seemed weird to me. I never had a taco made with shredded cabbage instead of lettuce. Their burritos also had cabbage. My sister wanted a Chimichanga and I wanted a Chili Rellaño, so we felt disappointed. We settled for a ‘La Gringa Taco’ – recommended by Edward, who waited on us. I also ordered a Quesadilla and sis ordered a Chili Verde Burrito.

While waiting for our order, we were a captive audience for Chelas lively background music. It was as jarring as it was unconventional. The volume was too much to suit me – no surprises there. If asked to describe the genre, I would say it was ‘Mexican Polka’. The tempo was crazy fast and the lyrics were in Spanish. I’m embarrassed to admit that I caught myself bobbing my head and dancing my shoulders along with it at times.

So why am I giving Chelas ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (4 hearts out of 5)?

The food is that yummy. Period.

I think we will order it to go next time. Unless of course we’re in one of our Mexican Polka moods.