The Hopeful (Lazy?) Gardener

~ JodiLea

I come from a long line of Kansas farmers, who are no doubt laughing beyond the grave as they shake their heads at my flower garden.

Hey! I planted the daffodil bulbs in December and they are popping up on schedule. AND I have spent 2 weekends hacking weeds out of the California soil, which really isn’t soil at all, just dirty gravel broken up with rocks.

I was tired and achy and succumbed to temptation from a mail-order catalog that promised “quick and easy” beautiful flower gardens. I ordered these organic roll out strips filled with seeds and followed the instructions (except for the part that told me to remove all the rocks from the flower bed – which could never happen).

Flower Strips

Wah-Lah! This is the before photo of my beautiful flower garden.  (Note the timely daffodil’s growing in the center) I just need to keep it damp for 2 weeks and the seeds will germinate.  Unfortunately, it  looks ridiculous now.

It was forecast to rain yesterday, so I did not water the precious strips. Dang! By the time I get home they may have dried out. Luckily I get home around 2:30pm, so maybe not all is lost.

I’ll know in a couple of weeks if I blew 20 bucks or not  😉

Misadventures With Technology

~ JodiLea ~ 4 Comments

Well, I’ve crossed over.

Mother Board

I bought an iPhone. It is so awesome!

I downloaded my first app yesterday – a diabetic management software.  What?  Well, maybe I will download something fun next time, but I would feel too guilty playing games on my phone while I need to do other things. I’m hoping that “Glucose Buddy” will  rescue me from handwritten forms and complex Excel spreadsheets. That would free up a lot of my time so I could have some fun.

The second app I downloaded was “WordPress”. (Only second because I had trouble finding it.) I still don’t have it set up right because I published a short post from my phone before this one and it must have floated off into a wireless black-hole, because it is not here among my other posts. Maybe it will turn up later. I am not knowing.

I’m terrified that I will damage the thing. I did not buy the insurance, which will probably bite me in the ass later, but the phone cost enough by itself, ya know? You probably do, because unlike me you have had your smartphone for years and have mastered it. I have a feeling that my phone will be smarter than me for a long time.

Please don’t be upset if I don’t call you for a while – I still need to figure out the contacts list thingy.

🙂
photo credit: willc2 via photopin cc

Never Choke in a Restaurant in the South!

~ JodiLea



Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation.

Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich,  begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says,
‘Kin ya swallar?’

The woman shakes her head no.

Then he asks, ‘Kin ya breathe?’

The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.
As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table.

His partner says, ‘Ya know, I’d heerd of that there ‘Hind Lick Maneuver’ but I ain’t niver seed nobody do it!’

Now, that’s funny!

Story courtesy of Aunt Carmen 😉