5 Things That Would Have Killed Grandma (if She Wasn’t Already Dead)

My dear paternal Grandma, was a very opinionated lady. You always knew where you stood with her. You always knew where she stood about everything. She was also a fun-loving and free-spirited gal. She loved television and when she lived in Los Angeles she got herself on some game shows. I never got to see her on TV. When I was a kid we only had tape recorders and they were not state-of-the-art. Forget DVR’s set up to record shows. Hell – we didn’t even have cable!

I spent a lot of time with grandma, on her couch, drinking diet soda and watching TV, game shows and classics like The Andy Griffith Show, F-Troop, The Beverly Hillbillies, The Rifleman, Perry Mason – I could go on, but I won’t. She never watched “serials”, which back in the day were what soap operas were called. They were too stressful for her to watch she told me. Everyone was always sick, broken-hearted or marrying the wrong people. She said they were too much like real life.

Reality: I have to laugh when I imagine grandma watching one of today’s “Reality Shows”. I doubt she would have watched many of them, based on their title alone. “Naked and Afraid” comes to mind. Last night I came across a new title: “Naked Dating”. I had to put on my glasses to make sure I was reading it correctly. When I stopped laughing, after 15 minutes or so, curiosity won out and I tuned in for a minute. A minute was all it took for me to confirm the stupidity. Picture this:  A man and a woman, completely nude  (their naughty bits are blurred out),  on a date.

Now this “date” was not your dinner and a movie kind of date. It was filmed at a nudist camp slash tropical resort, somewhere with huts on stilts along the shoreline.  So, it wasn’t a date at all, but a couple flirting over cocktails. Then the couple joined 2 other couples and all of them flirted with each other. No one went home with the date they came with. In fact, they left you with the feeling that switching partners was a normal occurence around there. And the show is filmed like Survivor, mostly interviews with the “daters” talking behind everyone elses back. Two thumbs down and no stars. Only the title is funny.

Facial piercings & tattoo’s: When I got my ears pierced for 8th grade graduation grandma shook her head and told me “Now you have ruined your ears for life!” If she found out about her great-great granddaughters ink she would punish ME, because somehow, I screwed up as a parent.

Her piano: I gave her piano, that she left to me, away!  To a great home and very, very nice family. The little girl who wanted to take lessons name is Lillian. Just like yours! How wonderful is that, heh?  It was a sign grandma, seriously.

The traffic on I-580: When I was a kid that freeway was barely a freeway and there only seemed to be traffic when you were waiting at the stop sign to get on the freeway. No Portola Ave. on-ramp then. A stop sign then turn left onto the road, as fast as your car could go. Things are waaay different now.

Her collections: She loved covered wagons and birthday angels. She kept grandpa busy building shelves and cabinets to display all that she brought home from travels, stores and garage sales. Back then she was considered eccentric and got written up in the local newspaper with lots of photos of her huge collection.

Now she would probably be sought out by the producers of Hoarders.

♥  TTFN  ♥

 

 

 

 

It’s Official – I Have Arrived

Ziva-HowlingLast week I was going crazy. This week I am HERE.

At first, I refused to think about how much I had going on. Secondly, I continued down the river (you know, de Nile) until I got here.  PANIC should arrive anytime now.

Oh, what have I put on my to-do list…

Board Secretary for Quilter’s Guild for the past few years. A lot of time consuming things, but not a bad position. I heard a rumor that someone else would be taking over as secretary in 2017.   Just wait, they’ll nominate me for President, or some crazy idea. It is an election year – Ha!

I am also the Webmistress for the Quilt Guild.  Write blog posts, take photos, yada, yada. I have tried to get others to contribute ideas or posts, to no avail. I suspect they do not read it.  [Pout]

Speaking about not reading – my novel is being sorely neglected. To make matters worse, I can’t decide on the ending. My next novel should take less time because I have learned to stick to the outline!  A comprehensive outline, that I put together BEFORE I start in.

Then, a couple of weeks ago – the final factor in my arriving at crazy – I decide to “do” Mary Kay because I absolutely love the products and have been a customer for many years and it just made sense.

Now I have inventory, business cards, customer catalogs, and a Website customers can order from me 24/7.  I have already had people contacting me on my website!

Because I had no spare time before becoming an “Independent Beauty Consultant”, I have no time to hit the local businesses and ask them to allow me to put a small Mary Kay “contest” display  at their business. I have no time to set up appointments to have parties to demo products, and make contacts  for future sales. But the beauty of this opportunity is that for now I can shop for myself with amazing discount benefits and I have no quotas I have to make.

Hey! It sounded like such fun.

Why have I done this to myself, you ask.

Well, don’t ask me!  I have gone crazy, remember?

♥  TTFN  ♥

Oh yes,  and please visit my Mary Kay website and shop around!  🙂

http://www.MaryKay.com/JLGreenfield/en-us

 

 

 

Football Has Never Been This Cute Before

Ah Oh! My Grandma is coming out with this post!…

I will be cheering for a new team this year – The NU Junior Miners, 8 and under.  It is the team my granddaughter is on. That’s right, I said my granddaughter.

FirstDayOfPractice1

I was able to attend the very first team practice on July 25th. It was exciting and very suspenseful it turned out..

I swelled with pride to watch our Chloe doing those running in place “down-up” drills. Coach praised her and said she was the fastest and to keep up the good work. Every 10-15 minutes, coach sent them all “to the bench” which meant run over to your parents and drink some water.

HydratingAtPractice

The high temp that day was 100 degrees, and it was still HOT when practice began at 6:00 pm. I was shocked to find out that practice lasted for 2 full hours – An hour past bedtime for some of those kids!

It was nearly 7:00 pm when the first kid lost it.

One of the older boys ran off the field. His parents were sitting on the edge of the field we were on. The poor kid was shaking and crying so hard he could barely speak. When he was able to get some words out they conveyed desperation and panic.

I want to go home now!” “I can’t do this!”  “It’s too hard” “I’m going to quit!” The more his parents tried to calm him the more desperate he became. These kids have run hard, and doing exercises constantly (even for water breaks they had to run off the field then back again).

If an 8-year-old boy is destroyed by the first hour of practice, how the hell is a 6-year-old going to hold up?  Well, she lasted for another half-hour before losing her mind. Shaking, Sobbing and repeating what was becoming the mantra of the evening “I can’t do this!  It’s too hard.”

I was impressed how parents reacted to this situation. They were calm and supported of their children, but wanted them to stick it out for the entire practice. They wanted them to sit (off the field) and listen and watch the team drills. No one yelled at the coaches to tone it down. There were no riots or injuries (like those soccer people always seem to have) either.

Once my granddaughter was calm and caught her breath, she was still reluctant to get back in there. Until coach started them on her favorite drill.

“Oh look! They are doing the defensive drills,” my daughter says.

“OK – I’ll try again,” Miss 51 said. Although her lower lip trembled, and her eyes had tears left in them, she put on her “brave face”, waved to us as she ran back onto the field and got into line. After her turn, she would circle back and get into another line. She made me think of the Energizer bunny – she kept going and going and going.

She managed to make it through to the end, 8:05 according to my watch. I knew she would. FirstDayOnField

Her first game is this weekend, and I am so bummed I can’t go! I expect my  daughter to take video!!  Would it be too much to ask my Son-in-Law to call me during the game and give me a radio announcer’s version? I’m thinking, hey, he’s there watching it anyway, right?

OMG!  She even stands like a football player – isn’t that so cute?

♥  TTFN  ♥