Top 10 Goals (of a Mad Woman)


Last night I said I did not make New Year’s Resolutions. I do, however, write down goals for the year and try to meet them. There is a difference between the two.

  1. Stop procrastinating the things I want to do, to get chores done. I will try to procrastinate doing chores (even though messiness drives me nuts) – so I can write, read, sew, knit, crochet when I want to. Guilt free.
  2. Participate in Postaday2013 – you know there will be one. And I love entertaining my victims readers  ♥
  3. Select a new and more professional theme for my blog. Or a more silly one. It depends on how goofy I get before midnight  😉
  4. In the spring, I will bury the ashes of my beloved Mother, and dog Molly. No, not mixed together!  But I thought about it.
  5. Follow my Doctor’s “suggestion” to: “Find a good therapist”.  My Doctor just met me and already he has figured out I’m “not right”.  [I figure he is an exceptional diagnostician, but way, WAY nicer than Gregory House.  Like who isn’t?]
  6. Keep reminding myself of #1. Especially the “guilt free” part.
  7. Start meditating again. I am wound tighter than a little travel alarm clock that jitter-bugs across the end table and takes a nose-dive to the floor because it can’t stop going until it’s finished.
  8. Try Yoga for exercise since I can’t walk on water – even when it’s frozen.
  9. Keep asking hubby to vacuum for me because when a man picks out a vacuum cleaner, it serves him right.
  10. I want to complete my last will and testament. People in my family don’t live very long, ya know.




photo credit (HNY): ღßẲŁĘĘღ»سبــحأن الله« via photopin cc
photo credit (Goals): duncan via photopin cc

Bears Don’t Meditate In The Woods…


I came across this poster today and it made me giggle. Not because it’s all that funny, but it was a reminder of my own encounter with a bear, armed only with my iPhone. The iPhone would have been more useful than a camera because I could dial 9-1-1. If I was at the top of the tree I could maybe get a bar or two. I am such an optimist! Or is it denial? I get those mixed up all the time.

The odds of any help getting there in time to rescue me are astronomical. Winning Lotto probably has better odds. Bears climb trees faster than grandmothers with acrophobia and a bad back.

Thankfully, my bear left the scene and I didn’t have to climb any trees that day. The next day, while enjoying my morning coffee, I see the bear again!  He is sitting by the same tree  No Way! I said out-loud to myself.   All Right – now this is just too much for even me to believe. Especially when he was back again the third day…

There must be some shadow/light combination that makes those trees look like a bear during breakfast. Sure enough, when I looked out the window an hour after breakfast, he wasn’t to be seen. I felt embarrassed, yet relieved, to discover my meditating bear was not real.  Now, if I really do see a bear, who will take me serious enough to check it out?  Not hubby or hubby’s friend.

Hubby has a gun safe in his shop. There are modern rifles, WWII era rifles, and various pistols locked in it. If I’m going to hike the trail into the forest by myself (cause hubby is too busy to go) I want to be armed with more than just my iPhone. More than imaginary Bear Repellent, even.

Well, dear readers, don’t y’all worry. Skittish grandmothers won’t be hiking through the Stanislaus National Forest with firearms. Dammit!

Hubby refuses to give me the combination.