Tag: postaday2011

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Week Two

~ JodiLea ~ 1 Comment

Goofy

May 29th, 2011

Dear Diary,

Everyday I feel more goofy than the last. I wonder if it’s the increase of oxygen going to my brain now.  Not enough oxygen to make me euphoric or silly,  but enough to make me useless.

I just want to sleep and eat. Period. Caffeine helps for maybe 10 minutes, then it wears off and I want a nap. Yes, another one. Forget cleaning the house and other chores – I can’t even gather enough energy to write my daily post. Dinner this week has consisted of left-overs from the back of the refrigerator. Tonight I may have to actually cook something. I hope I have all the ingredients for spaghetti because I know I don’t have the energy to go grocery shopping too.

Is this withdrawal or a physiological response to the weather?

Memorial Day weekend used to be the official welcoming of summer. Not a re-run of winter. This overcast and chilly weather is pissing me off. It  poured rain in Central California this week, and the temp hovered around 60. It is usually  105 degrees here in June.  Sweltering graduation ceremonies and frying at the Livermore Rodeo is tradition…

Where the Hell is global warming when you need it?

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Week One

~ JodiLea

May 27th, 2011

Dear Diary,

I think smoking dampens your sex drive.

After a week of not doing it (smoking, that is), I am starting to think about doing you know what.  Often.  I have not been this frisky in years. I hope this is a lasting side-effect.

My TMJ has really acted up the past few days. I must be clenching my teeth, or sucking too hard on my little candies. Whatever is causing it has to stop – the pain is incredible. And yes, I am doing my jaw exercises and not chewing gum. I need Motrin, ice and a Valium. Two out of the three will have to suffice.

I pray that it’s not an abscessed tooth disguised as TMJ.  This would not surprise me much. It is a holiday weekend and things like that happen to me, when my dentist’s office is closed or he’s on vacation. He vacations a lot more since he got me for a patient. I’m pretty sure my bad teeth has paid for either his BMW or his boat too.

Anyway, I am rambling (OK, bitching). Need to stir the green chili burrito meat and take my ice pack to bed for a nap. Maybe I’ll have a fabulous dream….

Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Day 6

~ JodiLea ~ 1 Comment

May 26th, 2011

Dear Diary,

I’m doing better in the morning now. But after lunch I really want to smoke. In between tasks I want to light up and “reward” my self for a job well done.

I need to learn to reward myself with something good for me. Instead I want something really good, but not for me, ya know? Like sugary desserts, highly caffeinated beverages, and very expensive beauty treatments.

ChocolatesAs a hyperactive diabetic with no money, those treats are not for me. Just when a girl could start feeling sorry for herself, Whitman came out with a sugar-free Sampler. I got a box for my birthday and it even has the map inside the lid so you know what you’re gonna get (unlike Forest Gump’s chocolates).   And, if you are wondering – they taste wonderful!

There happens to be a disturbing side-effect with sugar-free chocolates & candies, however. If you eat too many you can end up, well…, in trouble. Trouble of the ‘RUN FOREST RUN’ kind.

At least this takes your mind off smoking…