I think I gained 10 pounds this weekend. I really wanted to sneak my birthday cake into my room and eat the thing by myself. There is only a large piece left and I want to hide it from my hubby before I go off to Curves. Yes – I know it’s ridiculous, and I don’t care.
The withdrawal symptoms have increased. What’s up with that? I am wearing the patch, so my body is getting Nicotine, from a new delivery system. The Bitch (my addiction, if you are joining this diary recently), demands the drug be administered in heavy doses that immediately reach the bloodstream. She is not liking this slow steady method and being The Bitch she is, my day has been shitty.
I did manage to get a couple of things accomplished at work today. Then I spent the last 3 hours cleaning my office. My bookshelves have been a disaster and I was not going to tolerate it anymore. I know that tomorrow I will not remember why I put this here and the other over there. The important thing is I have gotten rid of some irrelevant papers and the dust bunnies.
Tomorrow will be interesting. I have only 1/2 dose left of Welbutrin (a drug prescribed for helping your mood while you fight your addictions, among other things). My doctor was on vacation and it did not get refilled today. I forgot to order the refill on time. That is so unlike me, since I’m pretty anal about my refills. I bet The Bitch had something to do with this.
I am tired, grumpy, and have had a headache all day. And that last piece of birthday cake? I told him I wanted it for myself, but hubby had the audacity to eat half of it right after dinner. I knew I should have hidden it from the bum….
2 thoughts on “Diary of a Nicotine Addict: Day 4”
My mom told me her father was a 2 packs a day smoker. Then he suddenly stopped at age 60. Fortunately there were no withdrawal symptoms, but he did chew a lot of bubble gums.
Bubble gum is a good way to entertain your mouth – thanks for the reminder!!
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